Cats Made Of Rabbits

I was at The Peach Tree which is the best place to stop off of Highway 5 as their vintage lunch box and thermos collection rules.

While perusing their gift shop I spotted some super realistic looking cats, like too realistic looking. "Is this some kind of cat taxidermy?" I thought. I picked one up and saw the quality assurance. This cat was made with 100% real genuine rabbit fur!

Some things are so weird the weirdness can't hit you all at once. I was halfway back to Sacramento when it occurred to me how very bizarre it is to make cats out of rabbits. They're killing a live, real animal and reassembling it's carcass to look like another animal. Amazing. They killed rabbits and made cats out of them.

To make one animal out of another is indeed the height of human ingenuity. Do me a favor though. If you see the flying saucers landing, if the aliens are invading, HIDE THE CATS MADE OF RABBITS! If an advanced civilization is assessing our value and potential I think it will be tough to explain Auschwitz, Hiroshima and the Trail of Tears but I think they will understand tribalism and warfare. I'm pretty sure cats made of rabbits will label us suitable only for soup-stock.

Joe The Plumber, STILL

"Media shouldn't report on war" reports Joe the Plumber, media correspondent, covering...um, the war. It seems a conservative website as desperate for our attention as Joe is teamed up with the genius plumber who complained because Barack Obama wanted to save him money. They've turned him into Joe The Reporter.

Worst extension of undeserved 15 minutes of fame ever.

Merry Twisted Christmas

Truly, truly, truly AWFUL


And if that wasn't bad enough, try getting through this one...

Hookers, A Great Gift Idea

Seeing the front of this pack of Hookers you might think, "Alright Keith, you are soooo immature, they are just hooks for carrying your skis. Grow up already."
And I could hear you saying that (you condescending bastard) but I AM immature and so could not resist taking a better look whilst giggling to myself "Tee hee, hookers, tee hee, it says hookers."

Take a peek at the BACK Side of this nice little package and then tell me that someone, somewhere along the line did not know damn well what they were doing!!!

MAKE IT EASY WITH HOOKERS!
And there's one sexy little ski bunny, who probably had no idea that she was filling that sweater in order to appear along side such text. "A Great Gift Idea" indeed. "TEE HEE" INDEED!!!

Now then, please go back and reread this post so you can giggle at me telling you to look at the backside of the Hookers. Teee heee. I even made reference to the Hookers' nice package! BWA HA HA HA! Okay, so maybe I am a bit immature, just a bit. Hookers!

The Worst Toy Ever?

Before you read any further, click the above graphic and read this amazing ad.
You're back? WOW! Wild eh? And yes, it is real. "Don't worry, this is New York. Nobody will help her." Great stuff.

What kid wouldn't want his own little torture chamber? There were eight "Monster Scenes" sets including one titled "The Pain Parlor." The most shocking and most important is of course, "The Victim"
What can you say about a company that sells to kids with a tag line like "Rated X... for Exitement?"
So how the hell did Aurora get away with this one? Well, they didn't; not for long...

"Massive protests against the kits came from religious publications and general newspapers, since they all thought that it promoted sex and sadism among children. All the negative publicity led to an immediate stop of production for these kits in May 1971, by the company which now had new owners: Nabisco Inc.
The kits remaining on the toy store shelves led to new protests in November, this time outside Nabisco's headquarters in New York. These protests held by groups as: Parents for Responsibility in the Toy Industry, and National Organization for Women, resulted in a recall of the Monster Scenes kits from store shelves in the U.S."

Thank you to our pals at Retrocrush.com for this. Be sure to check out all their great Halloween posts.