Little did I know that the Mom juju was powerful enough to over come the slight technicality of my not having children. I speak of course of my ever-loving cat, Killwhitey.
Her hobbies include such things as jumping from second story windows, playing rousing games of tarantula ball and my personal favorite taunting the nine foot python, a game I like to call playing snake food.
I have had to pull her both from the awning above my apartment and the telephone wires above my roof.
In short this animal is slowly graying my hair and ulcerating my stomach much like I did to my poor mother all those years ago.
Keith has taken pity on me and ceased the early morning phone calls he once took such joy in. Whitey, sharing with Keith some need to stop me from ever sleeping past sunrise opted to get me out of bed this morning by filling my stove with dirt by smashing a potted plant on it. Kinda her way of saying "Get up Dad it's 6 am and time to play".
Bless her little black heart